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Funny SMS and Shayari

 

Husband: Meri BV Gum ho Gae Hay!
Post Master: Andhay ye post office hay,
Police Station jao.
Husband: Maaf Kejeay Ga Khushi may Smjh nai a Rha Kidhar jaaon?

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Boy : Agar Main Kahon Mujhe Tum Se Mohabbat Hai Aur
Meri Bas Yahi Chahat Hy Tou Kya Kaho Gi?

Girl : Me Tm Se Kahungi Ye Bat Agar Tum
Kahin Khana Khila K Kehte, Zara Mobile
Balance Dalwa K Kehte Tou Acha Hota…

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JATT: Tumhe rajput kyon kehte hain?
RAJPUT: Hum apni baat pe jaan de dete hain,
aur tumhe ‘JATT’ kyon kehte hai?
JATT: Hum bina BAAT PE JAAN LE LETE HAIN.

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Pathan Received A Message From His Girl Friend,

“I MISS YOU”

:

:

:

Soch Soch Kar Pathan Ne Reply Kiya,

“I MR. YOU”

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1 ladki valentines day pe dukan-dar se
Esa card he jis me likha ho k me tumse pyar karti hun?

Dukandar:Haan he

Ladki: 2 darjan pack kar do.

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Customer: ye cow kitney ki he?
Cow saler: 30,000 ki or 2 saal mai 1 bacha deti he.
Customer: or ye cow kitne ki he?
Cow saler: 10,000 ki or ye 2 saal mai 5 bachey deti he.
Customer: ye cow itni sasti kion he jabke ye tou saal mai 5 bachey deti he?
Cow saler: sahab CHARACTER bhi koi cheez hoti he.

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Height Of Hazir Jawabi !

Ek Larka Gadhay Ke Samne Gir Gaya..

Ek Khubsurat Larki Ne Dekha Aur Boli :

Apne Bare Bhai Ke Paon Chu Rahe Ho..??

Larka: Jee Bhabhi.. : )

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Sardar ki wife in romantic mood

Sardar ki wife romantic mood main pooray bed pr bazu phaila kr lait k boli

“kuch samjhe”?

Sardar: Haan, kameeni.

Tu purey bed pr akeli sona chahti ha….

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Sardar petrol pump gya, wahan usne aik board pe likha dekha
‘Dont Use mobile here’
Sardar G ny mobile nikala or har dost phone kar k kaha
‘Dont Call Me Now!

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Ek din bhagwan sharab peeny
zameen per aa giya 50 boltle peenay
k baad dukan wala bola
“ap ko charti nahi hay?”
bhagwan: main bhagwan hun
Club wala: charh gaye salay ko

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News reporter:
KHAN SAAB ye batain k plateform
par kharay saray pathan kaisay maray?
Pathan: aik elan hua k train plateform per aa rahi hai,
sub ne patri par chalang laga di.
Reporter:Phir aap kaisay buch gaye?
Pathan:main khudkushi k liye patri per leta tha,
ye elan suna to main plateform per ja ker lait gaya:)

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Aik pathan ki shadi hoi usne dulhan ka ghoongat uthaya aur pyar se bola
“o khocha tum itna khobsorat hai to tmhara bhai kitna khubsorat hogi:-)“

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Ik mandir ki deewar pay likha tha: agar app gunha kar k
thak chuky hain tu ander aiay.
Neechy lipistick say likha hoa tha
Agar nahi thaky tu samny waly ghar main ajiay

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar key promotion ho gayi exective se manager wo ghar gaya
b.v ko new style main bataya ‘tu aj raat manager naal soye gi’
b.v behosh

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Pathan Picnic Par Gaya

Pathan Tharmos Le Ke Picnic Par Gaya..

Pathan: Iss Main Thandi Cheez Thandi,

Aur Garam Cheez Garam Rehti Hai..

Dost: Tum Iss Main Kya Laye Ho..??

Pathan: 4 Qulfi Aur 2 Cup Chaye.. 😉

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Cow Par Betha 1 Pathan

Cow Par Bethay 1 Pathan Ko,

Traffic Police Ne Rok Kar Kaha:

Aap Ka Helmet Nahi Hai..??

Chalan Hoga.. !!

Pathan: Dheyan Se Dekh Nechay

Andhay Four Wheeler Hai.. 😉

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Santa: Main Ne SANIA MIRZA

Se Phone Par Baat Ki..

Banta: That’s Great Yaar..

Uss Ne Kya Kaha..??

Santa: Uss Ne Kaha..

:

:

:

Wrong Number.. 🙁

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Pathan Captured a girl,

Gave her a dice n said:

If u get 1,2,3,4 or 5 i’ll kiss U.

girl: ager 6 aya tuo?

Pathan: Ludo nahi khela kia? dubara bari aayege

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Women’s Day Par 1 Larki Ne Pathan Se Kaha:

“Aap Ko Pata Hai Aaj Women’s Day Hai..??”

Pathan Ne Ghabra Kay Kaha:

“Kamal Hai, Jab Hum Ghar Se Nikla Tha,

Tab Tou Tuesday Tha..” 😉

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Cheif justice: You are crossing limits.

Musharraf: Kon Sala kehta hay.

CJ : how dare you call me sala.

Musharraf : oh no no. I said kon ’sa law’ kehta hai !!!

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hont se hont milte hain tu kya huta hai??
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
socho??
?
?
nai pata?
???
?
?
uff
kitna ganda sochte ho kuch nai bus moo band huta hai

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Mad Cow Disease

There are two cows in the field
1st cow: are you afraid of mad cow disease??

2nd cow: naaaa! it can’t affect me because ‘i am a rabbit’

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A memon on his death time ..
My wife Where r u ?
Wife : yes i m here
Memon :My sons , My daughters r u all here ?
Yes Papa …

To phir yeH barabar waly room ka pankha kiun chal rha hy …

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Sardar 1st Time JAHAZ Main Betha..

Jahaz Runway Par Chal Raha Tha..

Sardar Ne Pilot Ko Thap’par Mara Aur Bola:

Mujhe Dair Ho Rahi Hai Aur Tu BY ROAD Ja Raha Hai..

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Sardar 2 doctr: Mujhey 1 problem hay
DR:Kia?
Sardar:Bat karty waqt admi dikhai nahin deta
Dr:aisa kub hota hay?
Sardar:Phone kartay waqt

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Man:Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kia karte ho?
Sardar:AC k pas ja k beth jata hon

Man:Agar phir bhi garmi lagay to?
Sardar:To A/C on kar laita hon

Originally posted 2016-11-01 22:21:34.