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Funny SMS and Shayari

 

Husband: Meri BV Gum ho Gae Hay!
Post Master: Andhay ye post office hay,
Police Station jao.
Husband: Maaf Kejeay Ga Khushi may Smjh nai a Rha Kidhar jaaon?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Boy : Agar Main Kahon Mujhe Tum Se Mohabbat Hai Aur
Meri Bas Yahi Chahat Hy Tou Kya Kaho Gi?

Girl : Me Tm Se Kahungi Ye Bat Agar Tum
Kahin Khana Khila K Kehte, Zara Mobile
Balance Dalwa K Kehte Tou Acha Hota…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JATT: Tumhe rajput kyon kehte hain?
RAJPUT: Hum apni baat pe jaan de dete hain,
aur tumhe ‘JATT’ kyon kehte hai?
JATT: Hum bina BAAT PE JAAN LE LETE HAIN.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pathan Received A Message From His Girl Friend,

“I MISS YOU”

:

:

:

Soch Soch Kar Pathan Ne Reply Kiya,

“I MR. YOU”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1 ladki valentines day pe dukan-dar se
Esa card he jis me likha ho k me tumse pyar karti hun?

Dukandar:Haan he

Ladki: 2 darjan pack kar do.

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Customer: ye cow kitney ki he?
Cow saler: 30,000 ki or 2 saal mai 1 bacha deti he.
Customer: or ye cow kitne ki he?
Cow saler: 10,000 ki or ye 2 saal mai 5 bachey deti he.
Customer: ye cow itni sasti kion he jabke ye tou saal mai 5 bachey deti he?
Cow saler: sahab CHARACTER bhi koi cheez hoti he.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Height Of Hazir Jawabi !

Ek Larka Gadhay Ke Samne Gir Gaya..

Ek Khubsurat Larki Ne Dekha Aur Boli :

Apne Bare Bhai Ke Paon Chu Rahe Ho..??

Larka: Jee Bhabhi.. : )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar ki wife in romantic mood

Sardar ki wife romantic mood main pooray bed pr bazu phaila kr lait k boli

“kuch samjhe”?

Sardar: Haan, kameeni.

Tu purey bed pr akeli sona chahti ha….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar petrol pump gya, wahan usne aik board pe likha dekha
‘Dont Use mobile here’
Sardar G ny mobile nikala or har dost phone kar k kaha
‘Dont Call Me Now!

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Ek din bhagwan sharab peeny
zameen per aa giya 50 boltle peenay
k baad dukan wala bola
“ap ko charti nahi hay?”
bhagwan: main bhagwan hun
Club wala: charh gaye salay ko

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

News reporter:
KHAN SAAB ye batain k plateform
par kharay saray pathan kaisay maray?
Pathan: aik elan hua k train plateform per aa rahi hai,
sub ne patri par chalang laga di.
Reporter:Phir aap kaisay buch gaye?
Pathan:main khudkushi k liye patri per leta tha,
ye elan suna to main plateform per ja ker lait gaya:)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aik pathan ki shadi hoi usne dulhan ka ghoongat uthaya aur pyar se bola
“o khocha tum itna khobsorat hai to tmhara bhai kitna khubsorat hogi:-)“

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ik mandir ki deewar pay likha tha: agar app gunha kar k
thak chuky hain tu ander aiay.
Neechy lipistick say likha hoa tha
Agar nahi thaky tu samny waly ghar main ajiay

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar key promotion ho gayi exective se manager wo ghar gaya
b.v ko new style main bataya ‘tu aj raat manager naal soye gi’
b.v behosh

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pathan Picnic Par Gaya

Pathan Tharmos Le Ke Picnic Par Gaya..

Pathan: Iss Main Thandi Cheez Thandi,

Aur Garam Cheez Garam Rehti Hai..

Dost: Tum Iss Main Kya Laye Ho..??

Pathan: 4 Qulfi Aur 2 Cup Chaye.. 😉

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cow Par Betha 1 Pathan

Cow Par Bethay 1 Pathan Ko,

Traffic Police Ne Rok Kar Kaha:

Aap Ka Helmet Nahi Hai..??

Chalan Hoga.. !!

Pathan: Dheyan Se Dekh Nechay

Andhay Four Wheeler Hai.. 😉

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Santa: Main Ne SANIA MIRZA

Se Phone Par Baat Ki..

Banta: That’s Great Yaar..

Uss Ne Kya Kaha..??

Santa: Uss Ne Kaha..

:

:

:

Wrong Number.. 🙁

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pathan Captured a girl,

Gave her a dice n said:

If u get 1,2,3,4 or 5 i’ll kiss U.

girl: ager 6 aya tuo?

Pathan: Ludo nahi khela kia? dubara bari aayege

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Women’s Day Par 1 Larki Ne Pathan Se Kaha:

“Aap Ko Pata Hai Aaj Women’s Day Hai..??”

Pathan Ne Ghabra Kay Kaha:

“Kamal Hai, Jab Hum Ghar Se Nikla Tha,

Tab Tou Tuesday Tha..” 😉

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cheif justice: You are crossing limits.

Musharraf: Kon Sala kehta hay.

CJ : how dare you call me sala.

Musharraf : oh no no. I said kon ’sa law’ kehta hai !!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

hont se hont milte hain tu kya huta hai??
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
socho??
?
?
nai pata?
???
?
?
uff
kitna ganda sochte ho kuch nai bus moo band huta hai

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mad Cow Disease

There are two cows in the field
1st cow: are you afraid of mad cow disease??

2nd cow: naaaa! it can’t affect me because ‘i am a rabbit’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A memon on his death time ..
My wife Where r u ?
Wife : yes i m here
Memon :My sons , My daughters r u all here ?
Yes Papa …

To phir yeH barabar waly room ka pankha kiun chal rha hy …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar 1st Time JAHAZ Main Betha..

Jahaz Runway Par Chal Raha Tha..

Sardar Ne Pilot Ko Thap’par Mara Aur Bola:

Mujhe Dair Ho Rahi Hai Aur Tu BY ROAD Ja Raha Hai..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sardar 2 doctr: Mujhey 1 problem hay
DR:Kia?
Sardar:Bat karty waqt admi dikhai nahin deta
Dr:aisa kub hota hay?
Sardar:Phone kartay waqt

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man:Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kia karte ho?
Sardar:AC k pas ja k beth jata hon

Man:Agar phir bhi garmi lagay to?
Sardar:To A/C on kar laita hon

Originally posted 2016-11-01 22:21:34.

4 thoughts on “Funny SMS and Shayari”

  1. hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i like santa banta’s jokes very much andddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd and i always intrested to listen the jokes of santa and bantaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa orrrrrrr nai message jalti laoooo bor ho gaye purane messge sunte sunte dear andddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd what these foolish pathan jokes are.u must respect the people belonging to other caste for the sake of humanity

  2. hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i like santa banta’s jokes very much andddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd and i always intrested to listen the jokes of santa and bantaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa orrrrrrr nai message jalti laoooo bor ho gaye purane messge sunte sunte dear

  3. what these foolish sardar and pathan jokes are.u must respect the people belonging to other caste for the sake of humanity

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