Santa Banta Jokes

Kisi Shayar Ne Kaha Zindagi Ek Lamba Safar Hai,
Kisi Aashiq Ne Kaha Zindagi Ek Mushkil Paheli Hai,
Arre Dosto Zindagi Ka Arth Toh Sirf Voh Bata Sakta Hai,
Jiski Shaadi Ke Baad Bhi Koi Saheli Hai!!!

!!!!!!!!  funny shayaris  !!!!!!!!

Kaaash ke tere chehre par chechak ke daag hote……
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chechak ke daag hote…..
Kaaash ke tere chehre par chechak ke daag hote…..
Chand to tu hai hi ..sitaare bhee saath hote !!!

!!!!!!!!  funny shero shayari  !!!!!!!!

Mohabbat karna koi zulm nahi,
Agar ki jaye usool se,
Khuda ko bhi muhabbat thi,
Apne rasoul se
Chaand raaat ko sabhi dekhain, hilaal-e-eid ko
Ik hamara hi naseeba hadiyan turva gaya
Hum thy chaand ke nazaare main khoye hue
Bus achanak chand ka abba wahan pe aa gaye….

!!!!!!!!  urdu funny shayari  !!!!!!!!

Chandni raat thi, main so rahi thi
Phir kisi ne darwaza khutkhataya
Maine soncha mera dil aaya
Darwaza khol ker dekha to bijli ka bill aaaya

!!!!!!!!  hindi funny shayari  !!!!!!!!

Exam paas aaye, sir mera dukhaye
Teacher ne na jaaane kyun, dande dikhaye,
Ab to mera sir, jaage na sota hai,
Kya karoon haye, kuch kuch hota hai….

!!!!!!!!  funny sms shayari  !!!!!!!!

Shraab dard ki dawa hai
Peene se koi khraabi nahi
Dil ke dard se peete hain
Waise hum Shraabi nahi…

!!!!!!!!  hindi sms jokes  !!!!!!!!

Aey chaand, tu bhi kiya ghazab dhaata hai,
Bachpan main “mama” aur jawaani main “yaar” nazar aata hai.

!!!!!!!!  funny sher shayari  !!!!!!!!

Mere Dost Tum Bhi Likha Karo Shayari
Tumhara Bhi Meri Tarah Naam Ho Jayega
Jab Tum Par Bhi Padenge Ande Aur Tamatar
To Shaam Ki Sabji Ka Intajaam Ho Jayega…

!!!!!!!!  Love shayaris  !!!!!!!!

Agar manzil ko pana hai to himat saath rakhna,
Agar pyar ko pana hai to aitbar saath rakhna,
Agar hamesha muskurana ho to toothBRUSH AUR PASTE SAATH RAKHNA.

Dear Mr Bill Gates,

This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard.Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the ‘shut down Continued

Santa :-Yaar Banta Dr. ne kaha mujhe AIDS hai. Yeh AIDS hoti kya hai?

Banta Singh:-

A – Ab

I – Iss

D – Duniya se

S – Sat shri akal.

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Santa and Banta in a football stadium..

Santa : Paaji, yeh log ball se kya kar rahe hain?

Banta : goal kar rahe hain!!!

Santa :”lekin paaji ball toh pehle se gol hain , aur kitni gol

Karenge?”

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Santa To Banta:

oye tu her SMS mujhey tu duo bar q bhejta hay?

Banta:

vo is lia k ager tujhey ek forward kerna ho tuo doosra teray paas

rehna chaiyeh na

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Santa: raat paros wali larki mere dream main ayi thi

Jeeto: Acha? phir akeli he ayi ho gi

Santa: (Hairan ho ke) haan akeli thi lekin tumhain kese pata?

Jeeto: kyon ke us ka husband mere dream main aya hua tha

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Santa: Why there are always two cops in a car patrol ?

Banta: In case the siren won”t work, one of them to scream

“Wouuuu-Wouuuuu” and the other –

“Blue, Red, Blue, Red, Blue, Red..”

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Santa – My Wife Died Yesterday..

I am Trying To Cry But Tears Are Not Coming Out,

What To Do?

Banta – No Problem.

Just Imagine She Came Back.

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola:

“Menu koi farak nahin penda.

Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha

ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon.”

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Banta to his new bride, Preeto,

“Now that we are married,

do you think you will be able

to live on my small income?”

“Of course, dear, no trouble,” she replied.

“But what will you live on?”

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Preeto 2 maid:

Oh Kanta, I have reason 2 suspect that

Banta is having an affair with his secretary.

Kanta: I don’t believe it!

U r just trying 2 make me jealous.

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Banta owned a factory.

He issued orders that only married

men would be employed.

Friend asks: Why this ?

Bant reply:

Because married men are more obedient.

———————–Santa Banta SMS – love104.org ———————–

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer
for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your
notice.

1. After connecting to internet  we planned to open e-mail account and
whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ******
appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but
we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware
vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard.
Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****.
I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the ‘shut down ‘
button.

3. There is a button ‘start’ but there is no “stop” button. We request
you to check this.

4. We find there is ‘Run’ in the menu. One of my friend clicked ‘run ‘
has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to “sit”, so
that we can click that by sitting.

5. One doubt is that any ‘re-scooter’ available in system?  As I find
only ‘re-cycle’, but I own a scooter at my home.

6. There is ‘Find’ button but it is not working properly. My wife lost
the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ‘ find’,
but unable to trace. Is it a bug??

7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my ‘mouse’ from
CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.

8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning
‘HEARTS’ (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect
ur money.

9. My child learnt ‘Microsoft word’ now he wants to learn ‘Microsoft
sentence’, so when u will provide that?

10. Please congirm about “exit” button because here is only “Enter” no “exit”

Santa once wanted to transfer some files form one PC to another. Following was the steps followed by him.

1) Right clicked the mouse on the file which he wanted to transfer and selected CUT option.

2) Disconnected the mouse from that PC.

3) Took that mouse carefully and connected it to the other PC where he wanted to copy that file.

4) Right clicked the mouse and selec Continued

Khush Ho Tum Tu Khushi Meri Ho
Ro Tum Tu Ankhen Num Meri Hon
Ae Dost Hamari Dosti Itni Gehri Ho K
Sarak K Us Paar Tum Pito Aur Ghalti Meri Ho

Khuda Karay K Tum Ko Judai Na Milay
Kabhi Bhi Tanhai Na Milay
Mujhay Sms Na Karo To Kuch Aisa Ho
K Mosam Ho Sardi Ka Or Tum Ko Razai Na Milay

Girl : (Emotionaly)
Darte hain agg say kahin jal na jayen..
darte hain Khwab say Kahin Toot Na jayen..
Lakin Sub Say Ziada Darty hain Es baat say…
Kay App Hamain KAhin Bhool Na jaye..
Boy :
Yeh mat sochna ki hum bhool jayenge tuemhe…
Door rehkar bhi hamesha chahenge tumhe…
Agar Dost bankar raas na aaye to…..
Bhoot bankar darayenge tumhee…

Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye
Aur humare dil se awaaz nikalii….
Fiteh Mooh…Tusin Ethe vii aa gaye !!!

Dil se ek ishq ki Ek application kar raha hoon.
Pyaar se ‘debug’ karna mein wait kar raha hoon.
Tumhaare intezaar mein neend aayee so gaya.
Yeh dekho mera connection’time out’ ho gaya

Bhehar ki gali main paan ki dukan
Devdas ne dekhi Paro Ki muskan,
Devdas ne khilaya paro ko paan,
Khake paan Paro bolo”Shukriya Bhai Jan”

Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain
Jo bhii kaho gai merii dukaan per wo paogai
maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai
bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaogai

Kar diya izhare-ishq hamne telephone par,
laakh rupaye ki bat thi,
do rupaye main ho gayee (wah wah)

Kaash Tere Chehre Pe
Chickenpox Ke Daag Hote
Chand To Tum Ho Hi
Sitare Bhi Saath Hote

Khirki khuli zulfein bikhri
Dilne kaha dildar nikla
Par haire meri footi kismat
Nahaya hua sardar nikla..