Santa Banta’s SMS jokes
Titanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land”?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Two days of powercut in Delhi had made life miserable. Worst affected was Delhi Metro station where families of Santa & Banta were struck for 48 hrs on escalators.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
How did santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa: I have swallowed a kay.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I’ve seen ur password. It’s ****. Santa: U r wrong. It’s 1394.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa falls in love with a nurse… After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: “I luv u sister.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I’m coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn’t came back yet!
Santa: Why don’t u cook something else? .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
An Englishman and santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you changed your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn’t tell me where.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa and Banta went for a drive.
Santa: Hey, look out from the window, are the indicators working or not?
Banta puts his head out & says “Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa’s wife dies. He is calm, but his wife’s lover is crying furiously…
Finally, santa consoles him: Don’t worry buddy, I will marry again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The steering, dash board, gears of car have been stolen.
After sometime he calls again: I am coming, earlier I sat on the back seat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Powered by ScribeFire.
Last 5 posts in Hindi SMS & Shayri
- Tumhari Aankhen !!! - January 3rd, 2009
- Bahaut Tanha Hoon !!! - December 31st, 2008
- Intezaar Aaj Bhi Hai !!! - December 28th, 2008
- Kya Likhun....!!! - December 23rd, 2008
- Tum Aao To Hum Bhi Eid Karein !!! - December 7th, 2008
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!


On Sep 25, 2008 at 19:21:59, isha gupta 201 agcr enclave said:
very well done
On Aug 21, 2008 at 21:54:26, narinder said:
hilarious jokes…………….
On Jul 25, 2008 at 00:33:14, ur dad said:
u mother fuckers ….put some jokes on sharma n verma……..assholes
On Jun 25, 2008 at 15:33:48, anjali said:
it is awesome
On Apr 25, 2008 at 12:20:59, mohit said:
rohit kya hall hai kya ker raha hai
On Mar 28, 2008 at 05:06:39, Bhavin said:
It’s funny
On Mar 16, 2008 at 10:32:48, KCP said:
I LOVE IT.
On Jan 1, 2008 at 04:54:49, monu said:
i like this shayari i am reali impress